The Paper Bums: First Story

First Story: The Eternal S.D.

The elders of my clan would say, they came from the sky. Called them The Skypeople, but I knew they came from beyond the sky. A place of eternal darkness with endless grains of fire swirling around in the emptiness, the void.

I would see it when I would closed my eyes. When Father Light of the Sky would go down and Mother would Glow in the dark sky. Beyond the Skypeople would say I was a seer. That I had Satori. I had this feeling that not all of them liked it or thought I wouldn't speak the truth, that it was some kind of trick. It was the same thing with my people. They would throw big stones in front of me as I walked around the village. And they would make that sound as I walked by, warning me that I was not welcome.

Born of the earth people but not of the people. I would float from "Beyond" the Sky-People and with the earth people. Like a chameleon, I learned quick to change my colors not to trick my people or (beyond) the skypeople, but to survive. They didn't have to say, I can just see it in their eyes, its strange those that doubt or have hate, they have the same empty look in their eyes, never really understanding anything beyond sound and sight, they never felt the truth.

Beyond the Sky-People, were thin and tall like corn, they had less fur then us, they stood upright, their nose more flat and soft round face. They made strange sounds, if you just tried to hear what sounds they made, it sounds like a babbling river, all confusion no sense. But if you used your senses, all of them not just one, you can feel what they meant. My mother taught me this. I was a sick and was born too early, I was suppose to die.

They said my ears didn't work and they had to get rid of me for the good of the tribe. But my mom would hold me, and didn't want to let me go down the river. It costed us a lot, we had to stay behind in one spot, outside the clan. That's when the beyond the sky people first landed. I was stronger then and walking, gathering food just like my mother. I still could not hunt like my father, who had eyes of the ones that don't understand. I use to look at his eyes, I use to try to speak to him with my eyes, but he was empty, no light inside.  

My mother died touching the light of beyond the sky people. Fear of those beyond the sky people was floating thru the land. My father died soon after, he tried to hunt one of the sky people. They took his best wife and he looked weak in front of the clan. He didn't wanted to end up like me, the damned. But he ended up taking my faith, he lost that hunt and was sent down the river.  

Beyond the sky people would gather us in a circle and show us how to hunt, how they did. But they were too strong and fast for us. They would float around like a butterfly and then strike like a bee. But one would start every small hunt with reach out their arm and the hand curled as a ball. I don't know why but I just mimic the same and touch them. Both sides where shock, I got those eyes of a thousand bee stings looking at me.

One of the beyond the skypeople, took me in and teach me how to gather and hunt like them. It was strange because their gathering and hunting had nothing to do with our hunting and gathering. They didn't seem to care about wild fruit and wild animals. They would like to stand in one spot and have small hunt with each other, and throw spares into the earth. They wouldn't gather the fruit but gather the river. The wouldn't follow the father of the light in the sky, they would stand tall with there arms in the sky and speak of the shallows they casted on the lands.

I had a Skypeople Master, but I had the same feeling as I had with my father that they knew I didn't belong. The one that I belonged to, was my mother and she was dead. I wanted to go with her, I wanted to stop feeling like the empty darkness of beyond the sky, I wanted to go to grain of light.

One time when I closed my eyes, when mother of the dark sky glowed. I went to the light and my mother was there to greet me just before the light and told me that I don't beyond there, its not my time. That I need to be chameleon, to speak for the beyond the sky people, to our people. For after a million dances of the father of sky light and mother glow of the dark sky. That this light that was brewing inside needed to be released to save Gaia the earth. Once again there was nowhere I could call my own. But my mother was always good to me, so I listened, and I become hollow inside.  

My master would have me gather this fruit from the mush, and it would show me rooms inside my closed eyes, vast rooms of light and sound, and one room was the room of light inside my master head. There we would see sound, it was like when I closed my eyes under mother glow of the dark sky. There we understand each other, I learned that sounds would dance like light in the space, that with thoughts we can feel what the other wanted to say each other. Every time Mother glow of the sky was full ready to give birth to a new cycle of life of the sky. I would eat this mush-room, and feel and see what light my master wanted to pass on to me.

One time during our deep lessons of the mushrooms, he saw my fears, of how I knew how my people would look at me and said I had Sight of Damned. He knew that I felt like I didn't beyond to any people. That I wanted to go to the void and wanted to be one with the grain of light. But after we left the room of his head, he told me your inner name is too long and before you can go to the void beyond the sky, you need to fill the void thats inside, to save time and space in your head because this blocks sight. You will be named S.D.

Master was always cold but never wrong, so inside my head I would use S.D. and float in and out of both people and no sounds they could make would touch my thoughts inside, never to be hollow again inside, I started to fill my void with light. I didn't need to go to the grains of light in the void beyond the sky. My void insight was vast and it would take many lives to fill it with the light. Born into these people, but never of these people....