Large corporate juggernauts like CNN, ABC, CBS, NBC, MSNBC, ESPN, NYT, WaPo and WWE rule the fake news business today. These bloated, elephantine behemoths engorge themselves on the events of the world and then violently defecate the partially digested, twisted remains for you, the common citizen, to consume. Its a veritable ‘Human Centipede’ of news… And your at the back of the line.
Into this broken landscape steps Doppelgänger Satire. At first you don’t think much of the devastatingly handsome man with the aristocratic mustache, dapper suite and monocle. He’s evil and you know it. But you know that evil is often best fought by a different kind of evil. It’s true, he’s rude, abrasive and sarcastic. But at least he doesn’t claim to be good. As a matter of fact: All the ways you wish you could be, that’s him. He looks like you wanna look, he f**** like you wanna f***, he is smart, capable, and most importantly, he is free in all the ways that you are not. Hey, I should remember that; that’s good.
He’s intriguing yet tedious, fascinating yet monotonous, compelling yet dull. He’s everything you want. He’s everything you need. He’s everything inside of you that you wish you could be. He says all the right things at exactly the right time. But he means nothing to you and you don’t know why. There I go again. I need to start writing songs or something. Oh, who are you fooling? You’re lovesick!
You’ve been with other satire sites before. But nothing like this. The content is current and insightful. His writings take a slice of truth, a dash of news, a sprinkle of humor and mix them together until they are thoroughly blended. Then he pours them out onto the site in cute little posts and lets them gently bake until golden brown and crispy. Its his kitchen and you love the taste.
At first you wanted to play it cool. You didn’t want to seem too desperate. But after just a couple of posts you knew the real fake truth. He’s never gonna give you up; never gonna let you down; never gonna run around and desert you. He’s never gonna make you cry; never gonna say goodbye; never gonna tell a lie and hurt you. OK, I have to copyright that. You’re ready to take the next step, jump in with both feet, throw caution to the wind. You wanna get matching tattoos and sit up the whole night talking about what you’re going to name each of your twelve children. You know its finally time to bookmark
Doppelgängersatire.com.
So go on; do it. You know you want to. No, you need to. You have to. You cannot spend another minute without him. You want to email and text and share every post dozens of times across all of your social media so all of your friends and family can see. He has to be in your bookmarks list. No! your bookmarks tab. No! Your homepage! All those hours on the E-meter are finally paying off! You’ve finally achieved the highest level in satire: OC8! Welcome to the club!
Now you know the real fake truth!
Welcome to
Doppelgängersatire.com.