Hello. My name's Nick and it is my hope to be able share the benefits of Mindfulness with everyone who is prepared to listen.
I used to suffer from suicidal depression. About ten years ago I had fallen so far into my own black pit of despair that I found myself standing on a cliff edge seriously considering throwing myself into the sea below. Even if I survived the jumpl I knew that the tide would drag me out to sea and oblivion because I had even taken the trouble to find out the times of the ebb tide. The only thing stopping me was the thought of my wife and family and the devastating effect my suicide would have on them. Thoughts of my family were the little glimmer of light that led me away from that cliff edge and eventually on the road to recovery. It wasn’t an easy path. but thanks to the support of my family and doctor I worked through the challenges until I could eventually look back on that time as if it had happened to another person.
To help facilitate recovery my doctor put me onto anti-depressants. At the time these were essential for me but I found I needed to stay on them to help keep myself together. Now, although I have always believed that medication plays an important part in modern medicine I’ve never been a strong advocate of ‘popping pills’. After a number of years of being on the anti depressant regime I attempted to go without. All seemed fine for a while but wishful thinking made me overlook a number of warning signs. Small things got to me a lot more. I became more withdrawn and moody and would lose my temper over trivial matters. Things came to a head over a very minor matter at work which resulted in my having to take four months off. I had in effect suffered a mental breakdown. Again, with the support of my family, doctor and work place (plus medication again!) I came through but I had learnt a valuable lesson. If I was to do without the crutch of medication I would require some other form of support. I had dabbled in Mindfulness and Meditation on and off for a number of years but now decided to go ‘all in’. As well as self teaching and practice I took a number of courses in Meditation and Meditation teaching and also attended a course in the therapeutic use of Mindfulness. After months of reviewing the literature and also training my mind in the ways of Mindfulness and Meditation I have noticed profound changes in the way I look at the world and how I cope with the many challenges it can throw at us. I firmly believe Mindfulness is a potent tool that we can all have in our personal armoury that we can deploy at anytime during our daily lives. I am now making it my aim to pass on my personal methods and experiences of practicing Mindfulness in the hope that it may help as many people as possible.